At first, it can feel like a sign that you’re leading well.
People ask for your opinion. They trust your judgment. They want to make sure they’re doing things the right way.
Then the questions begin to pile up.
Can we make an exception for this customer? Should we move this person to another role? What should I say in that conversation? Can you approve this before I send it?
You answer because you care. You answer because the decision matters. And sometimes, if you’re honest, you answer because you can make it faster than you can explain how you made it.
But a strange thing happens when every decision comes back to you: the team stays busy, and you become the place where progress waits.
I’ve had to ask myself whether people were coming to me because they needed my judgment or because I had never given them the room to use theirs.
Here are seven thoughts for leaders who recognize that pattern.
1. Pay attention to the questions you keep answering.
One difficult decision may belong with you. The same decision arriving every week is telling you something.
Perhaps the standard is unclear. Perhaps the leader making the call fears being wrong. Perhaps you have corrected decisions so often that asking you first feels safer.
Before you give another answer, pause and ask: What would help this person make the next decision without me?
That question may lead to a clearer boundary, a better example, or a conversation you have been putting off.
What question keeps finding its way back to you?
2. Make the decision line visible.
People cannot take ownership of authority they cannot locate.
Some decisions require your involvement: a major financial commitment, a serious people issue, or a choice that changes the direction of the organization. Others belong to the person closest to the work.
Tell your leaders which decisions they can make on their own, which ones they should discuss with you, and which ones they should bring to you for approval. Give examples from real situations. Agree on the limits, then let them work within those limits.
If the decision line only exists in your head, your team will keep returning to you to find it.
Where does your team still have to guess whether it has permission?
3. Share how you think, not just what you decided.
An answer solves today’s problem. Your reasoning can help someone solve the next one.
When you make a call, let a developing leader hear what you considered. Who will be affected? What matters most here? What can we reverse if we learn something new? What would we need to communicate clearly?
Then invite them to offer their own recommendation before you offer yours. You may hear an angle you missed. You will also hear how they are learning to weigh the situation.
Are you passing along decisions or developing judgment?
4. Give people room to make a different good decision.
This one can be uncomfortable.
Someone on your team may choose an approach you would not have chosen. It may take longer. It may sound different. It may still serve the customer, protect the team, and honor the standard.
If you reclaim every decision that looks different from yours, people learn that ownership lasts only until you disagree.
Be clear about the outcome and the guardrails. Within them, let someone else’s judgment have room to grow.
What decision are you holding because you want it made your way?
5. Stay close enough to support without taking it back.
Giving someone authority does not mean leaving them alone with a problem they are not ready to carry.
Start with a decision they can reasonably own. Ask what they are considering. Name a risk they may have missed. Make sure they know when to call you. Then let them make the call and remain available afterward.
Growth usually includes some uncertainty. When we remove all of it for someone, we may also remove the part of the work that develops them.
Where could you offer support while leaving ownership in someone else’s hands?
6. Debrief the outcome without making people regret trying.
Some decisions will not turn out as hoped. How you respond then will shape the next hundred decisions your team makes.
Ask what they saw at the time, what they expected, what happened, and what they would do differently. Be honest about the cost of a mistake, especially when other people were affected. Help them repair what needs repairing.
If a thoughtful decision inside agreed boundaries is met with embarrassment or blame, people will bring the next decision back to you. If it becomes a chance to learn and take responsibility, their judgment gets stronger.
What does your response to a mistake teach your team about ownership?
7. Notice who can lead when you are away.
You can learn a great deal about your leadership when you are not in the room.
Do people know what matters? Can they resolve a problem, have a necessary conversation, and care for the people affected? Do they know when a decision truly needs you?
The goal is to make people more capable because you led them.
That takes time. It may begin with just one recurring question you decide to hand back, along with the clarity and support to answer it well.
Who is becoming more confident in their judgment because of your leadership?
A Thought to Carry Into the Week
The next time someone brings you a decision, notice your first impulse.
You may need to answer it. Some decisions are yours to carry.
But when the decision belongs to someone else, try asking: “What do you recommend, and what are you weighing?”
Listen. Help them see what matters. Agree on the boundaries. Then give them room to act.
Every decision that comes back to you is a chance to ask what the team needs from your leadership. Sometimes it needs your answer. Sometimes it needs the confidence and clarity to find its own.
It’s You.
It’s Your Life.
It’s Your Story.
